Given the popularity of boy bands in recent years, I have noticed the traits they all share are greatly highlighted, and thus share them with you, in hopes that your boy band be successful.
- Get a catchy name. The weirder the better. Go out to the nearest intersection and find a sign. For example, “Yield.”
- Now that you have a name, proceed to get members, preferably foreign and definitely not from the US. British is best, but Australian or Spanish work too.
- Make sure the number of members in your boy band is always greater or equal to three (3). Two is just a duo, and with three you can actually develop more “background and depth” to the members’ past experiences.
- Now that you have the members of your band, you must either have them all adopt the same last name or give them each a unique first name, preferably exotic. At least one of those names must contain the letter “z”.
- As for the public image of your boy band, make sure each of the members have a unique Twitter profile from which they only tweet random snippets of their day, and occasionally pictures of the rest of the members doing some sort of stupidity.
- A very important aspect of a boy band is music. Make sure that every single song has the word “love” in it, and that at least 74% of the latest album are songs about how women and girls are the best thing to ever happen to men. If inspiration does not come, just describe a woman’s physique in the most respectful way possible, and don’t forget to state in the lyrics that the song is about describing the most beautiful woman in the world.
- Once the album is released, make sure the iTunes version has exclusive tracks. One of them must be an acoustic version, and another one is some sort of remix or live performance. No more then four bonus tracks.
- For best results with song titles, use either one-word titles (such as “Girl”) or the most repetitive three words in the song’s lyrics (ex: “Like Nobody Else”). Get at least one guest artist to feature in one of your band’s songs.
- The first album’s title must always be the band name, but for the next two or three albums, the title must be one of the album’s songs. Starting from the third album, the title can be something more abstract, such as the first thing you see when looking out the window. Make sure that no song in the album actually contains the album’s title in the lyrics except one, the worst song of the album.
- Finally, make sure that each member of the boy band has a unique hairstyle and a special combination of hipster/rockabilly clothing. It is completely forbidden that each member dress the same, except when shooting music videos. At least one of the members must wear glasses at all times.
If you have followed these previous steps correctly, then you should soon have your very own successful boy band!
Yield - Birds In The Sky
All songs written by Zack Hannigan. Lyrics by Zack Hannigan & Jhonny Sky. Music by Zack Hannigan, Mike Sider, Neil Pane, Paul Carterford and Bobby Fleil.
1. Light Up My World
3. I Just Wanted to Say
4. Like Nobody Else
5. Forever & Always
6. If I Could (ft. Marco Alvarez H.)
7. Being With You
9. Back Home
iTunes Bonus Tracks:
1. Heartbeat (Live at Staples Center)
2. Folding Paper
3. If I Could (Acoustic Version)
que, te vas a tirar a todo One Direction?
There once was a girl who loved One Direction
She desired them, but they paid no attention
Once she saw she received no affection
She turned round and walked the other direction
mas complicado que un Words with Friends sin vocales
… y por eso me rasuro las piernas.